Laugh! This is serious!

In summer-time – even a rainy summer – family business sometimes takes place outside;  I’ve just  heard a frustrated parent across the back gardens shout: “Don’t laugh! This is serious!”

I’ve got into the habit, caught from Byron Katie and Nancy Klein (read their books if you haven’t already – they’re great!), of turning statements upside-down. So I experimented with this one, “Laugh! This is serious!”

 

Of course, LIFE, as understood in work, economics, politics, culture and religion, is serious. We live ever closer to the brink of disaster. The daily news brings doom and gloom. It was only recently that I noticed how much kinaesthetic language is employed in newspapers. That’s the language of touch, feeling, movement and weight (e.g. doom and gloom) – as opposed to visual language (vision, perspective, imagination etc.) and auditory language (sound, tell, tune etc.). Kinaesthetic words in news coverage outnumber visual and auditory by at least 4 to 1. Kinaesthetic battle language is especially popular.

From the latest news, I took just the kinaesthetic words from a short article about House of Lords reform in the Guardian (the red tops have perhaps even more K language):

“Angry confrontation … revolt … challenge … effective operation … rebellion … Prime Minister confronted … defy a three line whip … disgraceful … leading rebel … displeasure … anger … sought out … confronted … even more aggressive … damaged … resigned … sacked … thrown off course … whipping operation … withdrawal … join forces with the rebels to reject … failed to block … classic whipping operation … ran it with great discipline … risking … try to win … revive … get defeated again … object … damage … visceral issue … not budge … insisted … persuaded … win over … persuade … pressurized atmosphere … tempers may cool … raised the temperature … reject … remove … driving force … challenged  directly.”

Wow, does it make you feel tired? It does me!

Then I thought of popular phrases from politics, sport, health and religion:

Battle for hearts and minds; crush the opposition; fight the good fight; we will overcome; attack and defend the goal; love is war; crushing defeat; battle with cancer; fight for peace (I like that one!); battle of the sexes; battle of wills, a fighting chance.

I wonder what effect reading such kinaesthetic battle language day after day has on our perception of the world? You might think it encourages us to feel something, but it’s feeling that hangs heavily.

What if we found a different language, just in the spirit of turning things upside-down? For example, we could describe the political story in terms of sound for a change. The people involved would be discordant, and might shout, grumble or speak in a harsh tone … but they would express, pronounce, tell it as it is, and then they might tune-in, listen, hear, chime in, strike a chord, resonate and there would be dialogue, leading to a flow of discourse and eventual harmony, singing off the same hymn sheet

OK – games!  And I’m cheating a bit: I could have used more warlike sound language such as Bam! Kerpow! Splat! Bang! Bedoyng! Crash! Clap! Boom!  (this is easy, I’m writing in the middle of a thunder storm!)  But it’s still not the same, is it?

Maybe lightness itself is the missing piece?

Laugh! This is serious!

In coaching, laughter and tears are close bedfellows. Humour and laughter are often the elements that light the way into human darkness and allow you to see more clearly.  In a mire of heavy feeling, seeing clearly is just what’s wanted.

In these heavy-feeling times, the greatest leaders embrace the light touch – they avoid rigidity and dogma, move flexibly,  let go when necessary, and see things as they are,   People make a better decisions when they lighten up.

Remember Chesterton’s familiar quote, Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly .

Note especially the penultimate word. If you and I tread lightly today, what will be different?  How will we fly?

Voice & Speaking Skills For Dummies

Heading in large print, because my book is out! It’s full of good stuff, do dip into it. You can see the full contents and look inside on Amazon here.

Floating ahead to autumn …

… which will be here before we know it. It’s time to book for autumn events. The people who come to them make our workshops, and this year they achieved some amazing things, made individual break throughs, took important decisions, grew in confidence, capability and self-belief. You can read their own words on the website.

If you are tempted to dip your toe in the water, here’s a reminder of Autumn workshops and other events booking now.

Booking

To book any of the workshops below, go to www.voiceofinfluence.co.uk.  Or contact me at judy@voiceofinfluence.co.uk.  I offer special rates for deserving self funding people, those who work for charities and others.

Voice of Influence: 18-19 October 2012

Find your authentic powerful voice, overcome performance anxiety, and speak with confidence and ease – however daunted you are at present. This workshop meets you where you are, and allows you to discover your individual way to be a powerful speaker.

NLP Diploma

– the best of NLP in a convenient, affordable format – individual workshops can be taken separately:

Communication & Relationships: 25-26 October 2012

The ability to connect naturally with people – to have better relationships with others and with yourself – is a key attribute shared by all successful leaders.  After this workshop you’ll know yourself better, understand more clearly what makes others tick, and be considerably more confident in all situations that rely on good communication.

Leadership & Influence: 15-16 November 2012

A large part of your influence is connected to your sense of presence and whether others see the leader in you. This course will contribute significantly to your inner and outer confidence. You’ll feel more comfortable in your skin and be more present in the moment and able to manage your state as a leader in every sphere of your life.

Coaching & Change: 6-7 December 2012

The power of a simple conversation! Discover how to go for the best, and how to get the best out of others with subtle yet powerful coaching skills. Becoming a skilled coach of others is an important part of your own personal development, and you will find your effectiveness and creativity blossom as you help people step into their true potential.

NLP Practitioner: Spring 2013

3 days plus  1-2-1 – follows on from the Diploma. Put it all together and go for the NLP Practitioner qualification, which opens the way to the Master Practitioner and beyond.

NLP Conference now booking

This popular annual event in London, 9-11 November, is a great way to listen to some of the most interesting NLP teachers and thinkers from all over the world. Go to www.nlpconference.com for further details.

Spirit of Coaching

The 11th Spirit of Coaching event, ‘Going for Gold’, took place last week in London – what inspiring meetings these are! The Spirit of Coaching Conference is on 22 September in London. Further details very shortly.

 

So summer, and rain  in the UK  (laugh, this is serious!) –  I hope you experience lightness and fun during your summer – and moments of clarity too!

Go well!

Judy

Ginger and the Matrix

The ginger example Ginger

Odd encounters … visiting a relative recently, I discovered a foot high pile of large fresh ginger roots sitting on the kitchen counter.

‘Why such an enormous quantity of ginger?’ I asked.

‘Mmm, yes, er, internet mistake …’ came the slightly embarrassed reply.

I didn’t even know you could order ginger on the internet. My curiosity was rewarded with a gift, and I went home with a lovely plump root, keen to try it in some Thai cooking. What resulted was the best Thai dish I have ever tasted. I mean the best. I always use root ginger, but I had no idea that good quality fresh ginger could make such a difference. I mean, I don’t want to overstress the point, but I would have continued for the next thirty years to adjust the flavours of my oriental cooking seeking for better flavour without once realising that just because something is called ginger doesn’t mean that it’s the same as that something I used to call ginger.

… or that we always know what we are talking about when we use a word to talk about it. I’m referring to our tendency to stay inside the Matrix or system and a restricted way of thinking about things. As if that were all there were.

The news example

Take the Matrix called ‘the news’ for example: the journalist in the matrix knows that in their version of ‘the news’ the economy has a label called ‘problem’.

Being a problem, someone must be to blame, so he asks an economist whose fault it is.

That – even with its strong slant – being much too large a question for an 8 second sound bite, the economist replies that bonuses are too high.

Within a few days, there’s what Chris Mullin used to call a ‘feeding frenzy’ over bonuses, ‘symbolic’ stripping of knighthoods and the whole shebang -and we’re nowhere nearer to improving the economic situation.

We’re inside the Matrix – where ‘the news’ means problem and ‘problem’ means there must be a culprit, and ‘culprit’ for some reason is the main interest of the exercise.

The 17 camels example

Take the camels story as another example, do you know it? A man leaves 17 camels to his 3 sons. He leaves half his camels to his first-born, a third of his camels to his second son and one ninth of his camels to his third son. The sons are nonplussed, for the number seventeen doesn’t divide by 2, 3 or 9, and they can’t bring themselves to divide a live camel in pieces. They are stuck inside the dilemma.

But they step outside the dilemma and consult a wise old woman.

‘I can’t solve this for you’, she says, ‘But I could lend you one of my camels if you like.’

With 18 camels, the first son takes half – 9 camels, the second takes a third – 6 camels, and the third takes a ninth – 2 camels. That adds up to 17. There is one camel left over. So they give the old woman her camel back and everyone is happy.

Inside the Matrix of a particular way of thinking, it’s impossible. Step outside, or add something else to the mix, and it does become possible. It used to be called lateral thinking.

The problem person example

And finally a people example. I once had a real problem with a colleague. He was just difficult. I thought of many different ways to tackle the problem and improve my relationship with this person but nothing worked. I didn’t really expect it to because I was in a box which contained me and a ‘difficult person’.

That summer I went to America for a whole month, and broadened and changed my outlook in many ways. I had a wonderful time, and didn’t think once about my difficult colleague.

But on my return, he had changed without my doing anything. I wasn’t the person in that Matrix any more, and therefore he wasn’t the person of that Matrix any more.

In the NLP Diploma

One of the many things we examine in the NLP Diploma is systems theory -aka ‘escaping the Matrix’ – which enables you to debunk some current thinking around cause and effect and problem solving, for example:

  • Other people can make you feel bad – not true.
  • Trying harder is the key way to overcome lack of success – very often not.
  • Your problems are what they are irrespective of you – incorrect, you are affecting your problem by your relationship to it.
  • If you tackle a cause C, you can achieve an effect E. True, but you won’t do that without also causing possible negative side effects X, Y and Z, so it would be a good idea to discover what these might be before going ahead.

I sometimes ask myself when I encounter a problem, ‘If I were outside this matrix, what might it look like?’ You might like to try it if you get frustrated at some point later this week!

NLP Diploma

The NLP Diploma starts on 1 March with the first module, Communication & Relationships. The other modules are on 29-30 March (Leadership & Influence), and 17-18 April (Coaching & Change). You will pick up a load of useful leadership, management and relationship skills, plus invaluable personal gains including increased self knowledge and purpose, and a sense of ease and confidence in your everyday life. These are great tools for succeeding in whatever you dream of achieving in life.

Anyone who has done a good NLP course raves about it, and with good reason. It feels like common sense – but that commodity is not quite so common as we might think!

Voice of Influence Workshop

This is my well-known course for confidence, speaking and presentation skills. You could just get onto the 9-10 February workshop if you apply today. The following one is on 17-18 May.

Butterflies and Sweaty Palms:

25 Sure-Fire Ways to Speak and Present with Confidence

I’ve just sent off the final edits and checked the final illustrations. I believe it’s going to be an invaluable little book which you’ll want to keep by you every time you have to speak or present. Order yours today here on Amazon. It will be available on Kindle too – as is my first book, Voice of Influence.

Coaching Groups

Someone asked me about coaching groups. Three that I always find excellent when I attend are:

London Coaching Group www.londoncoachinggroup.co.uk
Next event 28 Feb.

Guildford Coaches Group http://guildfordcoaches.org
Next event 23 March.

Soul of Coaching Group www.alternatives.org.uk/Site/CoachingCircle
Next event 22 Feb.

Go well!

Festivals and Flying-Foxes

Sydney FestivalA few days ago I was reclining on the grass enjoying a picnic (along with 200,000 others) as enormous flying fox bats wheeled overhead and the sun went down on a summer day in Sydney. It was the first day of the Sydney Festival. As tickets sell out so fast for the festival, the city now puts on a special first day for free, so that the whole city – families, young and old – can enjoy international singers and bands at half a dozen open-air venues, with free bottles of water and buses running late to take people home.

Now I’m home to January frosts, and experiencing those moments every traveller recognises on return home, when things seem less obvious than before. Do I still drink tea in the morning? Do I still prefer the Guardian or was it the Telegraph? The daily gloom and doom seems less necessary. The countless routines of life no longer take place quite as unthinkingly as before.

Then gradually, daily life enfolds you again, and that foggy moment passes. You’re back with the familiar frames and filters … back in the matrix … But you’ve glimpsed something else – that brief moment when things are no longer obvious is the great gift of time away.

On my travels I’ve been reading ‘The Master and the Emissary’ by Iain Gilchrist (a fascinating book if you can cope with print the size of washing instructions on a shirt label). It explores the latest neuro-research into the left and right hemispheres of the brain. In a more complex way than previously thought, the left brain likes precision and categorisation with language to express it. The right brain holds the subtler bigger picture which is less easily pinned down by rules and language, and this hemisphere plays a far more major role than previously thought.

It’s the right hemisphere that enjoys moments when nothing is obvious; for these are moments out of which different kinds of insight can emerge. Think of historic instances of creative genius – the idea that just popped in as the bath overflowed or the apple fell on your head or you dreamed of riding sunbeams …

We can step out of our frame in various ways; one is to fly to the moon in your mind and look at your life from a distance; feeling your relative size when you are in mountains works in a similar way. Another (and a good antidote this to left brain New Year Resolutions that have you slogging to maintain some new routine …) is to do anything different from the norm just for the sake of it – take a different route home, eat a different food, read a different sort of book or paper, vary the order of your daily tasks … Every time we do things differently it gives us new insights – and brings pleasure at the same time.

I wonder what you might do differently – just for fun, just for the wonder of the thing? Gerald Manley Hopkins in the Windhover … (incidentally, did you know that the right hemisphere, though not till now associated with language, lights up for poetry?) … suggests that wonder is found in the plainest things, provided we lose our sense of knowing the obvious. The whole poem expresses it, but here are the last lines:

No wonder of it: shéer plód makes plough down sillion
Shine, and blue-bleak embers, ah my dear,
Fall, gall themselves, and gash gold-vermillion.

NLP Diploma

You’ll explore filters, frames and different perspectives in this course – and much more besides. This training is such a life changer – I’m constantly delighted with what people go on to achieve in living the lives they want (and only dreamed of before). First module, Communication and Relationships,  is on 1-2 March, 2nd module, Leadership and Influence, is on 29-30 March, and the final module, Coaching and Change, is on 26-27 April.

Voice of Influence Workshop

This popular course on speaking, presenting, and self confidence gives you the opportunity to learn and practise in a small group. Don’t remain unsure of yourself; becoming confident doesn’t mean changing who you are, it just requires you to learn new skills and approaches. It’s also absorbing and fun – as previous participants will tell you; all that is required is for you to register and turn up! Next workshop 9-10 February. The one after: 17-18 May.

All details on the website, www.voiceofinfluence.co.uk – also ask me about special offers if you do not have company funding.

New Books

I have two new books coming out this year. The first is Butterflies and Sweaty Palms: 25 Sure-Fire Ways to Speak and Present with Confidence published by Crown House. Out in February – available to pre-order on Amazon.

The second is due out in April – more information very soon!

And if you want the low-down on voice, you can find my book, Voice of Influence on Amazon too. It’s also out in Kindle. Or I can send you a signed copy.

Hope to meet you this year – at one of my courses, or at some other event. Come and say hello!

Warm good wishes,

Judy

Pathways

Path through summer woods with personI took a familiar walk through the Surrey woods near my dad’s house the other day, but the usual path had disappeared.  You’d think those ancient woods would remain unchanged through the years. But they don’t. Each season when the bracken pushes through the pathways shift and alter, and change the route from road to lake and lake to hill top.

It set me thinking to how we tend to assume that we too are unchanging – same old nose (not quite the right shape), same old legs, same old thoughts, same old me …

Same old blood pressure written in stone by the reading  in the surgery … though I know someone whose blood pressure hits the roof the moment they meet the doctor and is different as soon as they reach home!

Same old eyes, as the optician recommends set lenses … though I know that they improve with muscle exercises and are in any case more effective when I’m not tired.

Same old genes … as assumed by genetic research which tells me that this and that is to be expected because my genes say so. I almost bought that one till I heard about genes that switch on and off!

Same old brain; just so many cells – even if they gradually die off as you get older (abandon hope all who enter here).

Ah, but now we are learning that the brain is more plastic than previously thought. Cortical remapping occurs in response to injury. People with  strokes, cerebral palsy, and mental illness can train other areas of their brains through repetitive mental and physical activities. Life experience changes both the physical structure and functional organisation of the brain. Musicians develop stronger neural pathways that support musicality and dexterity. The brain waves of professional jazz players become more synchronised as they jam together. World-class athletes develop stronger alpha waves to cope with the ever-changing mix of intricate challenges they face. There is no doubt now –

thinking changes the brain.

If we keep thinking similar thoughts we are carving out neural pathways that make it increasingly easy to pursue those same thoughts next time… and next time … So constant negativity carves out a negative pathway. And self-believing thoughts carve a positive can-do pathway.

(Incidentally, what are you thinking NOW…?)

I’ve just finishing reading Bounce: The Myth of Talent and the Power of Practice by the international table tennis champion, Matthew Syed. He tells how just one street, Silverdale Road in Reading where he lived, produced at least 10 international and national table tennis champions in the 1980s, more than the rest of the UK put together. How on earth did that come about?

Syed explains that the enthusiastic local primary school teacher was a top national table tennis coach and a senior figure in the English Table Tennis Association, and any local kids who showed potential were persuaded to take their skills forward at the local club, Omega – open 24 hours a day – where they were given plenty of time, excellent coaching and  self belief.  A combination of opportunity, enjoyment, purposeful teaching with productive feedback and many hours of practice produced champions from a relatively small pool of young people.

This all points to the conclusion that nothing is just made that way, nothing is fixed, nothing is ordained. On the contrary, everything is plastic, everything is changeable, anything is possible. As in Silverdale Road, even neural pathways can be changed and new ones developed – if we do the work of activity and repetition to make it happen.

So when that moment comes – perhaps after you have been to the gym a few times, or eaten healthily for a week or so, or meditated or done early morning yoga for a few sessions, or walked to the station instead of taking the car once or twice, or sent out a dozen CVs with no reply, or phoned a few potential clients with little response – when that moment comes – when something inside you says,

“There’s no point in this, I’m not the sort of person who succeeds at this stuff”,

then you can know that yes, you are that sort of person – you are currently and always in the making – and that every bit of purposeful practice is taking you in the direction you want to go and will take you to where you want to be if you continue.

And, after all, life is not fixed like a noun. It’s not “arrival”, “success” or “achievement”. It’s always a verb – doing, moving, achieving, succeeding, becoming, being…

… and the neural pathways growing, shifting, changing, and finding new ways to the top of the hill! (your particular hill …)

Happy walks in the woods!

Rosie the hen went for a walk…

Rosie the hen

across the yard,

around the pond

over the haycock,

past the mill,

through the fence,

under the beehives,

and got back in time for dinner.

–    –    –

Do you know the picture story “Rosie’s Walk” by Pam Hutchins? The delight of it is that the pictures tell a different story from the words. Rosie the hen takes a happy little walk, but in the pictures we the readers spot the wicked fox tailing Rosie. He pounces on her and misses, landing on a rake and knocking himself out. He tries again by the pond and falls in. He tries repeatedly to catch her – each attempt a disaster – until finally he lands in a cart which runs out of control into a beehive, setting off an angry swarm of bees.

Meanwhile Rosie, serenely unaware of these catastrophic events, trots contentedly back into the hen house after her walk. …

I know people that trail disaster in their wake blithely unaware just like that, don’t you?!

But how many times does any of us flap our butterfly wings and cause a hurricane elsewhere? Hard to tell! – we all wear filters. Becoming aware of these filters – and expanding our awareness – is one of the most useful insights I’ve gained from NLP.

Bird’s eye view

“Rosie’s Walk” already offers one excellent method to expand awareness – get a bird’s eye view. When you have an issue, rise above it in your mind – way up as high as the moon if you want – and witness yourself and the elements of the problem from there. Seeing the picture as a whole like that often gives you new insights. Crucially, it enables you to view the whole system – and that allows you to recognise more complex relationships between the elements and see beyond the obvious sequence of A causes B, or A means B.

In my own life, when I suffered terrible performance anxiety and failed an audition in a grand Italian opera house it seemed an utter disaster at the time. I gave the event a meaning, “Failure.” (capital F!)

But the bird’s eye view of a couple of decades later – seeing the event in context – makes me realise the wealth of learning I’ve picked up from that experience – about performance anxiety, resilience, humour, compassion, understanding of human nature and more. I use the rich learning from that “failure” positively every week. “Failure” has in fact become “Resource”.

If you stick to one view like “Rosie” or a single label like “Failure” you often miss the bigger picture. Some people do that with their whole life by giving it a label such as “Life of a Victim” or Life of a Loser;” and rather than gradually growing a fresh wider perspective, life events are instead forced to fit the constricting old label.

So how can you adopt the bird’s eye view?

For some it comes naturally – they take different views of a situation as a matter of course. They are the people to model!

For me, it’s about deliberately making space every now and then and stepping out of the fully absorbing colourful business of living.

A friend of mine just says a loud internal “STOP!” ever so often, and this makes him pause to look at the system that is his life. He says his life is like a tangled ball of string, “But tangled or not, on those occasions I look at it as a whole and see that it is a perfectly shaped ball!”

Useful insight!

Play

If you took a large sheet of paper and ‘put’ your life on it – filling the page freely with pictures or words to illustrate all the different parts of your existence  – and then, having put it away for a day, looked at the whole paper afresh – bird’s eye view – I wonder what connections would occur to you …

… quite a few I would I imagine …

Perhaps you’d like to let me know!

Hottest day of the year since 2006 this week – wonderful summer,

Go well!

Judy

“… felt compelled to stop”

The location: Joshua Bell
Washington DC – a metro station

The spot:
the top of the escalator

The time:
7:51 am, Friday morning rush hour

The situation:
A man puts down his cap for money, gets out his violin and starts to play. He performs classical pieces for the next 43 minutes.

In that time, 1,097 people pass by, mostly on their way to work. Just about everyone walks straight past ignoring him. Of the people queuing at the lottery stand across the arcade not one person looks over at him.

The 64th passer-by is the first to turn his head towards the music, just for a second. After 4 minutes someone throws some money in the hat. After 6 minutes someone stops for a couple of minutes to listen, then walks on. After 10 minutes a 3-year old boy stops, but his mother pulls him along while he keeps turning around to look. In fact, every single time a child walks past it tries to stop and watch; and every single time, a parent scoots the kid away.

In 43 minutes, of the 1,097 passers-by in all 6 people stop to listen for a while. The man playing the violin collects $32.17 from his hat at the end.

How do we know this?

Because the event was being monitored by the Washington Post. A famous violinist had agreed with the newspaper to play in the underground as an experiment – would people respond in that setting, or not?

The violinist was Joshua Bell.

He is one of the finest classical musicians in the world. He’s in the news this week having just taken over as music director of the Academy of St Martin-in-the-Fields orchestra in London. On the occasion in the metro he was playing some of the greatest music ever written on a Stradivarius violin worth over 3 million dollars. He had played in Boston’s stately Symphony Hall three days previously to a packed house with people paying $100 plus per seat. Hundreds had crowded round the stage door afterwards for a glimpse of him. The newspaper in setting up this experiment was prepared for crowd problems, people flocking to the scene, traffic backing up …

The actual results shocked them.

To get feedback they took some people’s telephone numbers during the experiment telling them they were going to call later about the subject of commuting. They then followed up on 40 people the same evening. Most people hadn’t even noticed a violinist on their way to work. Only one person mentioned the violinist spontaneously: “It was a treat, just a brilliant, incredible way to start the day.” he said. One other had recognised him “It was the most astonishing thing I’ve ever seen in Washington,” she says. “Joshua Bell was standing there playing at rush hour, and people were not stopping, and not even looking.” Bell himself, watching a video of the event later found himself mystified less by people being in a hurry than by the fact that most people paid no attention at all as if he were invisible. “After all, I was making a lot of noise!” he said. Interestingly the children noticed – they were all affected by Bell’s violin playing.

One person who didn’t miss the treat was project manager at the Department of Energy, John Mortensen. He heard the music as he headed up the escalator on his way to work. He didn’t have more than a couple of minutes to spare. On the video you see him get off the escalator and look around. He sees the violinist, stops, walks away but then is drawn back. He checks the time on his mobile then settles against a wall to listen for a few minutes. He knows nothing at all about classical music but for the first time in his life he stops to listen to a street musician and gives him money. Asked about it afterwards he said he felt compelled to stop because the music made him feel at peace.

The thought springs to mind – if we miss one of the best musicians in the world playing some of the finest music ever written on one of the most beautiful instruments ever made … then what else might we be missing?

When in my teens I read W H Davies’ poem about having time to stand and stare, I used to think that noticing things was a matter of having enough time or indeed nothing better to do – okay if you’re a wanderer like Davies, you have all the time in the world, but not if you have a busy job.

I don’t think that any more.

I now think it’s not a time issue; it’s about being open to it – which means not just seeing and hearing but feeling too…

  • Like really hearing a blackbird one morning just for a few moments, the same blackbird you’ve heard countless times before, and thinking, wow, that’s truly amazing;
  • Like stopping for ten seconds to realise you are happy at a moment when you are happy
  • Like being with someone and suddenly feeling how great it is to have this person in your life just this moment now.
  • Like feeling the warmth of realising that this decision is the thing to do.

Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.
Albert Einstein

The trouble with busy-ness is not so much that it takes up time; it’s more that it hides something from us. In busy mode I feel so pleased with myself that I can do two things at once – use the internet while I’m travelling by train, text as I walk from the station or speak to someone on my mobile while I’m clearing kitchen surfaces, putting clothes away or even … don’t go there. But in busy mode I’m just that. Busy.

Maybe we don’t need more time; but just need a different way of looking – a way that opens us to the miraculous – and better judgement too.

“If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear to man as it is, infinite.”  William Blake

When I’m training, a great excitement is being there when a participant has an “ah-ha” moment. Suddenly they notice something that has always been there but not been seen before, and everything shifts. Coaching too is often about noticing things you haven’t noticed before. If someone can help you learn how to do that, go for it. It’ll transform your life and work and take you to some miraculous places.

The W. H. Davies poem? Here it is.

WHAT is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare?

No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And stare as long as sheep and cows:

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night:

No time to turn at Beauty’s glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance:

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began?

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare

NLP Practitioner, NLP Diploma

I’ve just finished my new book on overcoming performance anxiety. Look out for it in the autumn. And that’s when my workshops start again. You have the opportunity this autumn to do the NLP Diploma and then continue to the full NLP Practitioner finishing in January.

Have a look at the website for dates and read the testimonials … people get a lot out of the short modules – if your experience so far is company training courses, think again – these workshop days are enlightening, confidence building, full of useful tools and good fun. People often say that life and work seem easier afterwards.

SPECIAL VOUCHER CODE for NLP Diploma- £850!
Book each of the 3 modules individually but at the same time. In the Voucher box, insert VOI SPECIAL. That will bring the price of all 3 workshops booked together to £850.

Voice of Influence Workshop

My Voice of Influence Workshops start again at the end of September. Learn how to connect confidently with an audience – and much more.

Sign up for these workshops now.

Special Free Event:
Finding Your Voice – The Power of Authenticity

19 June in London with Judy Apps, 2.00 – 5.30. Details here.

Also at www.voiceofinfluence.co.uk – some great articles and free e-courses on NLP, Overcoming Performance Anxiety, Speaking with Authority, Raising Your Profile and more, newsletter archive, my book Voice of Influence and information on coaching by Skype, telephone or face-to-face.

Do get in touch if you have any comments or questions or want to know more.

June already – height of summer!

If you have just one moment today, what will you notice I wonder? …

Go well,

Gannets

In this newsletter

  • A Gannet Story
  • New excellent funding stream for training
  • Book for autumn now – New NLP Practitioner opportunity!
  • Recommended books

GannetsGannet

Gannets are on my mind this week. Sometimes a bird just gets a bad press. Until a few days ago I thought I knew all I needed to know about the gannet; i.e.

gannet – ˈɡanɪt/ – greedy bird (what my own mother called me when I purloined chocolate cake) which breeds in overcrowded quarrelsome colonies of hundreds of thousands on remote island rocks off Scotland.

That was before I saw a film recently of gannets diving for fish. Suddenly I was witnessing something astonishing. A handsome bird with an almost 2 metre wingspan hovered a 100 feet in the air like a kite or an eagle and then performed a spectacular nosedive at 60 miles per hour into the sea, becoming streamlined like a torpedo just before entering the water. Somehow it then turned again from torpedo into bird to beat its way out of the water into the air again with a fish in its beak – Watch it here.

What grace and power! Completely awe inspiring to watch.

That wasn’t the end of my gannet week though. The next gannet event was ridiculous. I saw a clip of young gannet fledglings on the high rock where the birds breed. At some point the fluffy young bird had to summon up the courage to jump off the cliff. It was too heavy to fly, so it half fell, half fluttered, banged itself on rocks, miraculously got up again, fell again, hit rocks again and bounced, got up again, fell again, and eventually dropped into the sea hundreds of feet below. How it survived I have no idea. What a scene of tragic-comedy!

So three different views of a bird:

  • On its breeding cliff greedy and everyday-quarrelsome
  • Diving into the ocean – powerful and extraordinary
  • Jumping/falling off the cliff – vulnerable and absurd

By the way, re the last clip the bird commentator added the postscript that the young bird – afloat for the first time in its life – would now swim to Norway – swim to Norway? – and when eventually it had the strength to take off in flight (another new skill!) in a couple of weeks it would migrate thousands of miles south, even as far as West Africa…

It struck me reading the week-end papers at leisure last week-end how much we are presented with just one view at a time. A while ago we had pictures of a strong leader with statesman-like pose meeting other world leaders at an international event. This week-end the news is of an evil tyrant and every photo shows the man with an evil expression – same man, different moment, different view. It’s the stuff of soap operas of course, perfect for keeping a story going. We thought she was a ‘goody’; but oh no! she’s a ‘baddy’ after all!

People protesting in the streets wear identical face masks of a certain politician bearing the same fixed expression – just one view. There you are, you can see that he’s not to be trusted, he has the ‘not-to-be-trusted’ expression fixed and unchanging on his mask of a face!

Great for soap operas and Mills and Boon; not so good for understanding people well.  When I’m coaching someone, sometimes they present to me an image of ‘vulnerable and absurd’ and tell me silently to believe it. But I don’t, because I know that hidden in them somewhere is also ‘powerful and extraordinary’; I believe in its existence even if they don’t themselves quite yet – and bit by bit, being seen, it finds the space to emerge.

I was inspired by the coach Tim Gallwey one year when he spoke about this very thing at the ICF Conference:

“The person is much bigger than what you see.  As a coach I believe in the existence of potential beyond what I see.  I see withdrawal, shutdownness, but I do not believe it.  You can’t do this just mentally. You’ve got to look for it, see it through the veils, through the acts people have on them to make us believe they are wonderful that’s covering their wonderfulness.  Good self images are the hard ones – an image is an image.  What about the thing being imaged.  You?”

ICF Conference Speech 1999

I like the last bit about images of being wonderful hiding a person’s wonderfulness – I know people who do that, don’t you?

I experience within myself too this limitation in viewing. One day I’m struggling with a fault on the computer and my overwhelming feeling is ‘vulnerable and absurd.’ I shout downstairs for assistance with helpless sighing and blue language…

The answer comes back up, “Just take it easy, I’m sure you can solve it.”

More blue language; more helpless sighing. ‘Vulnerable and absurd’ feels like the whole of me, I’m quite incapable of seeing beyond it.

And then – sometimes! – I look inside and discover ‘powerful’ and a whole new way of feeling and being. This allows me to take heart and proceed resolutely to resolve what is only a technical blip after all.

We are people of parts. There’s almost more – beyond what we believe to be there.

Wouldn’t it be great for the media in the 21st Century to mature into a greater appreciation of the multi-dimensionality of people – less of the cut-out 2D image, more of an exploration of the amazing amalgam we all are? They might think we’d hate it. I think we’d find it riveting.

Media are you listening?!

There’s always more …

Me and you – are you listening!

New funding for training

Check out this new funding stream if you are interested to apply for my NLP Diploma, Practitioner or the Voice of Influence course next autumn – it could save you considerably. The new Government Leadership and Management Advisory Service is offering funding for leadership and management skills for small businesses. Further details here.

NLP Diploma

The next NLP Diploma starts in October. Please see ‘Testimonials’ on my website for some of the comments of recent recipients of the award.

NLP is the great confidence builder – the Diploma offers six days of rich practical learning over a couple of months. People find it difficult to put NLP in a nutshell, but what you will certainly get out of the Diploma is the ability to be a more effective communicator and get on better with everyone, surer direction in your life, greater self awareness – including liking yourself better! – more influence and increased success at work and outside.  This makes it a great leadership course – a multi-dimensional package!

The price is again just £850 till September! To get this full 40%+ discount when booking on-line proceed as follows:

i. Book each of the 3 modules individually but at the same time (the discount only works if you book all three at once). Booking all three automatically triggers a 30% discount to start with.

ii. In the Voucher box, insert VOI SPECIAL. That will give the additional discount, bringing the price of all 3 workshops booked together to £850.

Alternatively, just fill in the booking form and email to me!

NLP Practitioner – register now

New opportunity! People have been asking me if they can continue on from the Diploma to the full NLP Practitioner and the answer – this year at least – is yes! If you already have my NLP Diploma or plan to take it this autumn, with three extra days of training in January 2012 plus a coaching session and individual study you can become a qualified NLP Practitioner through group coaching by February 2012. It’s an exciting course and probably the best value Practitioner you can do anywhere!

If you are interested please let me know immediately at judy@voiceofinfluence.co.uk.  I will send you further details for your final decision very shortly.

Voice of Influence Workshop

Book early for the next one – 30 September to 1 October.  More details at www.voiceofinfluence.co.uk

Books for Dummies

Finally, I’d like to highly recommend two fascinating books in that great ‘Dummies’ series by friends of mine.

Happy summer days to all!

Go well,

A cat tied to a pole

Cat tied to a poleHave you seen the film “Eat, Pray, Love”? In the original book Elizabeth Gilbert tells a cautionary tale heard during her time in an Indian ashram.

The story tells of a great saint who was always surrounded by his followers, with whom he would meditate for hours everyday.  The saint had a young cat who used to bother them all during meditation by walking through the temple meowing and purring. So the saint came up with the practical solution of tying the cat to a pole for the duration of the meditation so that people would not be disturbed. Every time they meditated they would first tie the cat to the pole, and this became a firm habit, and no one thought of beginning to meditate without first tying up the cat. It began to seem part of the ritual. So when the cat died, the saint’s followers were panic-stricken and a major religious crisis erupted: how could they possibly meditate now without a cat to tie to a pole? How would they reach God now?

How many daily rituals stem from forgotten and obsolete reasons? I have a sneaking feeling that probably an awful lot more than we realise …

 

I heard about someone who regularly used a delicious chicken recipe passed down in the family from her great-grandmother. One day she questioned her grandmother about it. “The chicken tastes so good,” she said. “The recipe says always to chop the chicken in two – is that the secret?” “Ah, no,” said the old woman; “my mother always did that because her cooking pot was too small to hold a whole chicken.” And everyone had just carried on doing it without question.

“Say please, say thank you,” I parroted to my children, or even, “What’s the magic word?” (pause while I cringe) as if that was the point. What I occasionally got instead was anger: “Thank YOU!! for giving back MY TOY!” when the original point behind the word was to feel and express gratitude. I saw a politician say “Sorreee!” in much the same way once … twice actually. It’s a bit like chopping the chicken in two; the word completely lost its original purpose.

Organisations spend considerable effort on “behavioural training,” such as the customer care instruction to say, “Have a nice day,” or “Enjoy your meal.” I would love to compile a video of the times those statements have been delivered with boredom or even resentment! But sound-bite ritual is satisfied: the cat has been tied to the pole.

I wonder how much of this behaviour without meaning stuff we could let go?

–        this week’s politically correct word for instance – I can’t keep up and surely it’s the attitude that counts?

–        parroting the ‘right’ words as if that’s alright then. Ditto when someone says the wrong thing and motivation isn’t taken into account – whatever the red-tops assert!

–        behaviour “management” – people can’t be “managed” into thoughtfulness or any real learning – they can only be motivated.

–        complex bureaucracy that has lost its original purpose

What would you let go of?

 

Monkey and banana experiment

Even our fear responses are behaviours with lost meaning if they belong to an outmoded story or someone else’s experience. Why take on inherited fears when we don’t even know what the cause was? Most of the “stuff” that sabotages us comes into this category.

Robert Dilts told me the story of the monkeys and the banana (taken from an experiment by G.R. Stephenson in 1967 I believe) which illustrates the point.

There are some monkeys in an experimental cage. The researcher hangs a banana on a string at the top of some stairs in the cage. Whenever a monkey climbs the stairs to get the banana he sets off a cold water hose which drenches all the monkeys in the cage. So, pretty soon, the monkeys prevent any single monkey from climbing the stairs and setting off the hose in an attempt to reach the banana.

The researcher turns off the water so that it is now safe to approach the banana. But the monkeys continue to stop each other from approaching the stairs.

One by one the monkeys are replaced by new monkeys. As each new monkey enters the cage it is attacked by the other monkeys when it attempts to climb the stairs, so it learns not to. Eventually, every monkey in the cage has been replaced, so no monkey now has ever experienced the soaking. But no monkey ever approaches the stairs again. That’s just the way things are. Another ‘religious’ ritual is born; another thought virus.

Achieving what we want is as much and more about letting go as about go-getting.

 

We’ve just had the latest two-day NLP training on Leadership and Influence. The distinction between behaviour and the values and beliefs that run that behaviour is a vital one. Yet the two are confounded constantly. I love the way NLP clarifies human action in so many ways and helps us get to the point. It stretches our ability to think and experience; participants love the challenge and grow in awareness and genuine confidence. It’s also wonderfully liberating to let go of stuff that gets in the way of success and happiness.

 “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” Lao Tzu
 

 Coaching and Change – 14-15 April 2011

My next 2-day NLP Workshop is Coaching and Change on 14-15 April.  Coaching – conversational change – is one of the best developments of the last twenty or so years. It is awe inspiring to witness the life changes that people achieve through coaching. Come and enjoy two days of some of the best coaching-learning. More information at www.voiceofinfluence.co.uk.

Voice of Influence – 31 March-1 April

And before that in the calendar, the next Voice of Influence Workshop is on 31 March – 1 April. This small-group-coaching course will take you from performance anxiety or a mild discomfort about presenting to inner confidence and assured delivery without notes – plus you’ll get excellent voice coaching. We already have a great group this month but there is still space for you, so look on the website for information. If you feel daunted, don’t let it put you off – you’ll find what you are looking for – and people who arrive scared always say they enjoy it.

If you are self-funding, work for a charity or are in genuinely difficult circumstances feel free to ask about special deals.

If you are looking at the website, take a glance at the testimonials. Most people come to these trainings through personal recommendation.

How to Raise Your Profile – NEW E-course on my website

to download at http://judyapps.co.uk/web/index.php/e-courses/how-to-raise-your-profile/.

Do you sometimes feel invisible and unappreciated? People don’t seem to listen to what you have to say? What seems to you the natural way to behave just doesn’t seem to be what is wanted around here? Or you’ve been told you need to raise your profile a bit more?… Whatever the reason, this e-course will show you that it is completely possible – for you – to be listened to, taken seriously, respected and remembered positively without changing the fundamentals of who you are.  Hope you enjoy  it!

Warm good wishes,

 Judy

Perspectives

Perspective colour pictureOur daughter is travelling in New Zealand and but for a sudden change of mind would have been in Christchurch yesterday when the powerful earthquake erupted. On hearing of the quake we experienced a short period of sharp worry, then a happy release when we heard she was okay. Life looked very different for that short period of not knowing.

“That certainly puts things in perspective!” we sighed with relief as we marvelled at her fortunate change of plan. And it did; our perspective changed utterly during those moments of uncertainty – what really mattered stood out with new prominence – it was like redrawing our map of the world.

Once we have genuinely different perspectives we are much better equipped to respond usefully to situations. We cannot trust just our own perspective – as is illustrated in yet another of my favourite visual illusions here.

At our Communication and Relationships workshop last week we did a familiar exercise on changing perspective. We looked at a relationship from our own point of view, from the other person’s point of view and from other perspectives as well. Afterwards – as often happens – someone commented that they thought they already knew what it was like from the other person’s point of view, but when they actually did the exercise their experience was wholly different and unexpected. What they thought they knew was not the case at all. We often imagine we are including other points of view in our thinking when we aren’t really. Have you ever said to yourself, “I know he thinks that I think that he thinks I’m a…?”!

Once we have genuinely different perspectives we are much better equipped to respond usefully to situations. We cannot trust just our own perspective – as is illustrated in yet another of my favourite visual illusions here.

Chequer board illusionObserve the small grey squares at the intersections of the larger black squares. Actually, they are not there! There are no small grey squares. Your eyes are creating the illusion. Funnily enough, each grey square is there until you really focus on it individually – as you change your perspective it dissolves.

(If you like visual illusions, try this moving pink dots one too, following the instructions below the picture: http://lightisreal.com/lightillusion.html.)

If you constantly trust only your own perspective you can get things so wrong! This was beautifully illustrated by the reaction of a BaMbuti pygmy called Kenge in the 1950s. The anthropologist Colin Turnbull describes what happened when he took Kenge out of the dense forest where he had lived his whole life without distant views and showed him the plains stretching far into the distance below:

“Kenge looked over the plains and down to where a herd of about a hundred buffalo were grazing some miles away. He asked me what kind of insects they were, and I told him they were buffalo, twice as big as the forest buffalo known to him. He laughed loudly and told me not to tell such stupid stories, and asked me again what kind of insects they were. He then talked to himself, for want of more intelligent company, and tried to liken the buffalo to the various beetles and ants with which he was familiar.” (Turnbull 1963)

sorry I shouted

NLP is all about redrawing our personal maps. Many (I would even say most) processes in NLP training are based on insights gained from a change of perspective. By perspective I do not refer just to looking but to evidence from the other senses as well. The kinaesthetic sense – feeling – is particularly important in this regard.

Sometimes in a course I will explain a concept and a participant will respond intellectually, “I get it.” Then they go off and have a practical experience of what we were talking about, and they come back and their physiology is different, their voice is different, the look in the eye is different; and they then say “I get it” from a completely different – deeper – place. That’s “getting it in the muscle.”

Feeling is often the crucial factor in being able to adopt a genuinely different perspective. It may happen that I’m able to see what you are going through; I can hear what’s going on for you. But when I step into your shoes and feel your perspective, ah, then I get it – in a much more settled way. And what I “get” is often very different from what I thought it would be – even oddly counter-intuitive at times. It doesn’t just add to my learning; it changes my learning.

           “Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world.”  Arthur Schopenhauer

          “A penny will hide the biggest star in the Universe if you hold it close enough to your eye.”  Samuel Grafton

Voice of Influence Workshop – 31 March–1 April

Interesting stuff…

The Voice of Influence workshop is coming up again in a couple of weeks. If there were ever an area where understanding the theory and getting it in practice were different public speaking is it. You tell yourself that you don’t need to shake from fear and then you shake anyway – it can be so frustrating! Getting it in the muscle in this workshop is such a relief for people and so effective too. It’s great to witness the changes that are achieved.

Leadership & Influence Workshop – 17-18 March

This workshop – which contributes towards the Diploma in NLP –also explores differences between thinking and doing. You will learn how to walk the talk as a leader and thus build a strong inner sense of confidence. You will also learn some great models of leadership, including systems thinking (see my last newsletter on babies being thrown out with the bath water in organisational change).

The workshops are friendly, lively and strongly focused. If you want to make changes you will make them here. Look at www.voiceofinfluence.co.uk for more information or contact me directly – I’m always happy to talk about your ideas and aspirations.

Coaching

I am more and more convinced by the art of coaching as an effective means of fulfilling your life’s promise. We all get stuck at times, and coaching is the best un-sticker I know!  But it’s also a great tool for highly successful people to step into the exceptional.

Most coaching clients arrange a short series of sessions – perhaps 4 or 6 – to achieve a particular set of outcomes.

What might you use coaching for? All sorts of reasons! Maybe one of the following?

  • To find out what you want and move towards it, e.g. clarify a career direction
  • To sort out some relationship(s) and move forward; to create new relationships
  • To prepare yourself for promotion, an interview, a conference, a bid
  • To move through personal blocks that are holding you back
  • To improve your performance in terms of leadership, management, personal organisation, confidence, impact etc.
  • To dream of the impossible, make it possible, and achieve it.

Richmond NLP Group – http://www.richmondnlpgroup.org.uk/

Do you know about this popular group? – they get some great speakers and sessions are interactive (to persist with my theme of getting it in the muscle). Next month’s session on Thursday 24th March features Arielle Essex talking about The Paradigm Shift – Turning Problems into Gifts – should be good! Contact Henrietta@RichmondNLPGroup.org.uk to sign up and for further information.

Go well!

The shortest distance between two points is a straight line – isn’t it?

wavy line illusionSome things are obvious.

It’s obvious that the lines on the right here are curved.  (they’re not – they are all straight and horizontal)

arrows illusion

It’s obvious that the horizontal green lines below are of different lengths.

(they’re not; they are all of precisely the same length.)

It’s obvious that when something is wrong it needs to be put right. That’s exactly what happened in the following three real life examples:

After a bomb was planted by the IRA in the Tower of London in 1974 action was taken to prevent the recurrence of such incidents. The solution was found. For the next 10 years visitors to the Tower were subjected to a search of their bags. I visited the Tower over 50 times in that period and the searching of bags was regular and thorough.

Nobodyeven if wearing a voluminous coat with pockets large as those of Fagin in Oliver Twist – nobody ever had their pockets searched.

When Lonhro took over The Observer newspaper in 1981, they suspected that money was being lost through some journalists exaggerating or cheating on their expenses (where have I heard that before?). The solution was found. Measures were taken to prevent this dishonesty. Journalists were requested to fill in expenses claims for every single item of expense, and unenthusiastically they complied.

What happened was that journalists who had previously been quite careless in claiming were forced to think about every item of expenditure. With such attention on the subject (and the lack of trust) even those who had been quite casual before began to register every expense and claims increased. Lonhro discovered that their costs, far from coming down, went up enormously.

After the costly Exxon Valdez oil spill in 1989 (where have I heard that before?!) a solution was found for the future. Many coastal states enacted laws to place unlimited liability on the tanker operators to ensure safer operation.

As a result, the huge Royal Dutch/Shell group began hiring independent ship companies to deliver oil to the United States. These tended to be fly-by-night tanker operators with leaky ships and iffy insurance, and thus the probability of spills increased and the likelihood of collecting damages decreased.

Beware of the obvious.  

Those of us that read our newspapers are given a daily training in black and white thinking: bad things need to be got rid of, people are good or bad; either it’s OK or it isn’t; the shortest distance between two points is always a straight line. All obvious.

Masters of the subtler martial arts tend not to use a straight block to an attack that’s the way people get hurt. Instead they employ circles that join the direction in which the opponent is already going and then continue in a circle until the direction is that which the master wants. When I met the elderly Maruyama Sensei, a famous master of the art, he sent a person flying across the room with the smallest of movements as his arm swept down in a circle. No effort, just gravity, the natural path of the circle and relaxation. Skill – that looks like pure magic. Watch 22 seconds here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VM_Guh5Mrs

systems circleI first explored in NLP the fascinating concept that for activities that involve humans the circle is usually more useful than the straight line. Any single action may have one obvious effect – A causes B – but that action in fact creates effects in many directions at once. These effects in turn have their own impact – often less obvious – on many other factors. This was illustrated to me by Robert Dilts as in this diagram.

The French economic journalist Frederic Bastiat back in the early 1800s wrote:  “There is only one difference between a bad economist and a good one: the bad economist confines himself to the visible effect; the good economist takes into account both the effect that can be seen and those effects that must be foreseen.”

We need to explore the system. Success lies in recognising and taking note of all the connections including unintended consequences, payoffs and by-products.

NLP has many elegant processes for exploring systems and they allow for emotional and other human elements as well as logic. They are invaluable for designing strategies. They also work on the simplest interchanges:

  • I’m doing it this way, says A.Blocking diagram
  • No, (blocking) do it this way, instructs B (pushing straight back.)
  • Don’t want to, (resisting back) growls A, digging heels in.
  • I’m doing it this way, says A again.
  • That’s interesting, comments B. Show me how it goes (continuing round the circle).going with diagram
  • A shows, feeling listened to (going with the energy)
  • That’s great, says B. And if we veered then a bit this way with this result, how would that be? (They are already travelling in the same direction so it is easy for A to accept the steer.)
  • That’s interesting, says A. Let’s try it.

The concept of systems as explored in NLP is an important one for our present climate of drastic change – how many times is the baby thrown out with the bath water by straight line thinking?

I always find that people are excited and amazed by NLP training – first by how much they discover that is new to them; and secondly by the sheer range of applications in their work and home life. If you decide to put your toe in the water I’m sure you will discover the same.

NLP Diploma

My next NLP Diploma starts very soon – on 17-18 February – in Hammersmith, London.

You can apply for the full Diploma – three 2-day modules between Feb and April – and the special offer of £850 for the whole Diploma continues this spring.

Or you can apply for individual modules – the first workshop, Communication and Relationships is on 17-18 February.

The Leadership and Influence module is on 17-18 March, and the Coaching and Change module is on 14-15 April.

More info at www.voiceofiinfluence.co.uk or from me – 07 515 717 611, judy@voiceofinfluence.co.uk.
There are also generous terms for people in particular circumstances. If you are hesitating because of funding – just contact me.

Voice of Influence Workshop

We have just had the latest Voice of Influence Workshop where participants achieved some great results. Here are snippets of the written comments from last week to give you a flavour:

Undoubtedly 2 days of my life well spent…  truly inspirational!  … I had real trepidation about this course but ended up having a really fun time … a wealth of voice and NLP experience to help you to achieve real improvements in how your present yourself to the world … Keep doing what you’re good at, as you’re truly amazing!!! … it was so much better than I ever imagined … we all gelled and felt really comfortable … you have given me confidence … so exciting, and so uplifting … I thank you with all my heart …   I have felt a load been lifted …  It’s been really fantastic  … content was clear, well-paced …  safe environment to stretch and learn and do it in such a seemingly effortless way … I was initially terrified … Relaxed, fun, interesting and I think eve ryone ‘grew’ quickly …  come away really wanting to put my hands-up for speaking gigs … quite a turnaround in two days! …  master at this topic and generously imparts her knowledge … subtly inspiring great shifts in her clients’ confidence … the workshop had a great flow … very relevant with lots of practical exercises that were imaginative and fun to do … really helped get the subject into my “muscles” … really interesting and enjoyable … a very authentic, attentive and skilled trainer … great role model …  2 really worthwhile days that have given me more awareness, skills and confidence … I have learnt a lot … really enjoyed the structure of the course … Really enjoyed the course … you attract some very kind and positive people … that is a great testament to you …

There is one more Voice of Influence Workshop this spring – on 31 March –
1 April. It is almost full, but there are still a few spaces. You can apply directly on-line or contact me. Is this your moment for finding your voice and your confidence?!

Look at the website

As usual there are lots of valuable resources on my website – have a look for free e-courses, my book Voice of Influence, articles, information about one-to-one coaching (the best thing of the last 20 years!) and more.

And a famous word on inter-connectedness:

A human being is part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.  Albert Einstein

Warm good wishes